Monday Motivation

If this precious little baby in my belly decides to make her appearance right on time, I will be a mother in 60 days. 60 days. That’s insane. In 60 days, my life will be forever changed as I learn everyday what it is to love someone more than I have ever understood was possible, protect her from as much as I can, and teach her as diligently as I can who she is because of whose she is. Since I have been pregnant, lots has changed. I eat lots of bagels (like a lot of bagels), can’t sleep on my belly, and I cry at the most bizarre times. As much as some of the times the waterworks come can only be explained by hormones from Satan himself, I am starting to wonder if sometimes the tears are different. I say this because there are a few songs that I can hear during pregnancy and be moved to tears in a way that feels nothing less than Spirit filled and Spirit driven. One of the songs that does this to me right now is the song “No Longer Slaves”. The lyrics that really get me are the following: 

“From my mothers womb
You have chosen me
Love has called my name
I’ve been born again, into a family
Your blood flows through my veins
I’m no longer a slave to fear
I am a child of God
I’m no longer a slave to fear
I am a child of God
I’m no longer a slave to fear
I am a child of God
I am surrounded
By the arms of the father
I am surrounded
By songs of deliverance
We've been liberated
From our bondage
We're the sons and the daughters
Let us sing our freedom”

At this very moment, inside my womb, the Lord is knitting together a precious little girl who will be born into a family so much greater than one that has mine and my husband’s last name attached to it. She is preparing to be born into a family that is made possible by the blood, love, and mercy of Jesus. It’s a family I have been a part of since I was in the same position as her. However, we are at such different stages in our membership in that family. Not because of our age or size difference, but rather because she has not yet fallen victim to the lies of the evil one. She is still pure and protected and safe from the bondage he has trapped me in time and time again. 

I don’t know what lie you believed or pain you have experienced that has moved you from a place of liberation into shackles of bondage. But I do know this. Bondage doesn’t have to be permanent, and freedom is always possible. Maybe bondage looks like illness (mental or physical), grief, lies, sin you cannot leave behind, family dysfunction, or something completely different. I don’t know what it is for you, and I know you are maybe thinking that sometimes leaving the bondage entirely isn’t up to you. You would be correct. As much as I would love for things to work this way, those who are physically ill or have to sit by and watch as their family crumbles around them cannot simply pray that pain and bondage away. I cannot pray my depression and anxiety away. Here is what I can do… I can believe that in spite of the situation that proves scary, difficult, and sometimes unbearable, I walk step by step with a God who chose me when I was in my mother’s womb to be a part of his family. And let me tell you, being a part of a family headed by the God of the universe means I have access to a peace, a love, a grace, a mercy, and a freedom unlike anything earthly freedom or peace can provide to me. I am free not because of my circumstances, whether they be good or bad. I am no longer a slave, and I am free because of the one who chooses to bear my burdens for me and daily provide me with exactly what my daily bread looks like for that day. 

I want my daughter to know that freedom. I want to teach her a freedom not dependent on earthly comfort but of heavenly deliverance. But I can’t teach her that until I believe it for myself. Someone around you needs you to teach them this lesson, but they too cannot fully receive it until you can fully teach it, and can we fully teach it if we haven’t tasted the freedom for ourselves?